r/bald is whatever the male equivalent of a magical girl transformation is

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r/bald is whatever the male equivalent of a magical girl transformation is

if you’re mad that a Lemmy shitpost mentions Reddit I’ll give you a second meme ABSOLUTELY FREE!!

but wait,,, THERES MORE !!! if you call right now I’ll throw in a third meme for only $19.99!!

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r/bald is an example of male centered body positivity. does it tend to be a little bit toxically positive? occasionally. however, the broad strokes are very healthy and deserve to be commended, especially as this is all ultimately a conversation about accepting what it means to perform masculinity in this day and age without bringing along a litany of toxically masculine traits. i genuinely appreciate what they’re doing and want to give them their roses as a male whose hair style is gender nonconforming. thank you, r/bald, for being kind, patient, and accepting of eachother

It’s been years since I’ve gone on Reddit aside from getting a thread as an answer to a search result but there was another subreddit for bald men that was way different in tone. The name escapes me but it was truly depressing and negative, lots of men that were extremely depressed, sometimes suicidal, and a ton of incel rhetoric about social death when bald

that reminds me of how there was MensLib which was genuinely about advancing a better understanding of what feminism means for men, and the ways an egalitarian society rather than a patriarchy would be better for men, and then there was MensLiberation which was a Men’s Rights Activists (manosphere) subreddit.*

*editor’s note: i may have these backwards


I think it was tressless, and I only know it bc one guy would sometimes come into other men’s subs talking about that sub and how depressed he was and how hair was the only thing that would ever make him happy. When people tried to show positivity and get him to see things in a different light he’d just ignore everything and talk about his depression.

He was way too far gone for reddit randos to help and really needed a professional but he ignored that advice as well. Then he’d delete the acct and show back up a week or so later with a new acct and the exact same talking points. It was really sad

Yeah that was the name. I knew it was some kind of weird shit

That rhetoric was huge there. I remember posting a few times and suggesting some people seek therapy for similar reasons you’ve outlined (irl therapist) and being met with tons of nasty posts. Thats where the incel rhetoric would come out to, I specifically remember one guy that was like “how could a woman understand” as if a therapist needs to have your personal experience to help, as if all therapists are women, etc





yesss, I wanted to add this one to the post but I couldn’t find it



Bro went from serial bomber to wholesome dad.


by can't point to earth on a map depth: 1

First pic literally looks like it was taken in a prison.

Yeah, lighting, posing, clothing, and location are doing work. Shave your head and you, too, will be allowed to leave your enclosure to experience sunlight!

That is what the drawing is getting at.

All of them do use the same trick telemarketers use to sell weight-loss products.



Your barber doesn’t want you to know about this one simple trick



Very few things look as universally bad as long hair on a balding person.

Long and silken like that of a Chinese man

With the skin of a hotdog

instead pumped full of nitrates, its roids.




David Lo-Pan?

Little old basket case on wheels or the ten foot tall road block?

(time for another watch!)


Lo Pan isn’t balding, he’s just bad at throwing knives.
~(At least that’s what ol Jack Burton would say)~



i think a chinese doll to be specifc, with hotdog skin.



i don’t know whether to repulse in horror or hatevote



bill bailey would beg to differ.

Yeah, he shows it’s just a normal thing that mens’ hair does, and nothing to be ashamed of. Don’t really get the all-or-nothing attitude.

If anything it hightlights that it’s a mostly a matter of grooming/health.

If your hair is healthy, well-kept and clean, plenty of styles will look good. The cut itself is less important. Unwashed, matted, and deep-fried by 3-in-1 ‘soaps’? Even a basic barber cut will look frizzy and unkempt.

Same for beards. A beard of any length looks good brushed with a coarse boar-brush, treated with beard balm, trimmed to shape. Left to grow put with no treatment, no brushing, no clipping? Any length looks haggard.

Healthy hair, healthy skin, natural lighting and a confident yet approachable demeaner do almost all the work for us.



The bald man with all the hair.


True, he really owned that look. There’s a lot of folk that couldn’t or wouldn’t get away with it though. There’s trend setters, trend followers, and then there’s folk like Bill. I put Johnny Depp in that category too. That guy looks good in anything, but imagine how many guys would look terrible if they tried to mimic his style.



Devin Townsend’s skullet was beautiful.


Donny Benet pulls it off



The change in facial expression and environment does heavy lifting too for the magical man transformation

Which is better, a clear evening sunset, or a dank room lit by a single cfl bulb


Sure, but based on experience, when the scalp is just sporadically putting hair out there, it’s pretty much always better to go all-in and shave it. Trying to make the most of remaining bits of hair is a lost cause. If you have some reasonable parts of your scalp still putting out volume, then the hair can look ok as long as it doesn’t grow out too much.



You still have the hair, it just moves to your face and ass.

Literally me from behind

Though to be fair my back is hairier


Unless you’re someone like me that can not grow a mustache doesn’t grow any sort of cheek hair for a beard. And naturally just grows a simple goatee that won’t get any longer than about an inch no matter how long you don’t shave it. And my ass is as smooth as a baby’s butt. So is my chest my arms and most of my legs. Luckily because I’m native American the likelihood of me actually becoming bald is not very high.

If you are balding, you’re pretty likely to have increased hair growth elsewhere. At last if it’s male pattern balding, because that is caused by high testosterone.



And nose and ears.

The ear hair is what gets me. I was at work one time and noticed a single three-inch hair growing off the back of my ear. WTF.

if i want to feel the wind in my hair i just bike in shorts



Don’t I know it.

My hairline is receding because my hair is marching down the back of my neck towards my ass crack.



Before: convicted serial killer’s mugshot

After: real estate agent about to retire early


The one thing i learned by getting bald is that its not a big deal to be bald and most people view it as something mundane. Only teenagers seem to not be able to handle other peoples baldnes.

Adults in the 90s and earlier also made it a big deal for some reason.



Had to go and look at the bald community on the bad website, and can confirm. Even the :( -> :) transformation


I love that subreddit. I’ve always had a soft spot for bald dudes since I got really into industrial metal as a teenager.


Gotta be honest, I don’t love the notion of reposting other people’s personal photos without their knowledge. I fully understand they (presumably) uploaded them themselves at first to the public internet, but it still feels icky to me.

Don’t be weird, all bald men are part of a collective hive mind. There’s no need to ask permission, they all act together as one. They probably released this meme themselves

yeah, we did while i was on the can. I think steve was in charge of the hive.



I especially don’t like it when they take other people’s photos and then imply shit like incest where they say the girl is defending the love for her brother. It’s obviously cyberbullying and spreading it ain’t cool.



Op bringing the deals like meme Costco



Oh if I was a student today I would be getting in trouble over those stickers. My sticker printing budget would be irresponsible.


Thanks for giving us three memes for the price of one!

I had to pay $19.99 for that last one :(



If I go bald I’ll probably be crying for six months straight.

Can’t I just go bald everywhere except the top of my head?


You get better about it with time, but yeah, the first six months is a bit more vulnerable. Eventually though you realize no one gives a shit and life gets better. Hell, take a peek at r/bald comments and you’ll see that there are some very vocal female fans of the bald look

I have extremely thick and fast growing curly red hair. But if for some reason i lost it I would go all in with a bushy red beard and being bald.


Yea baldness in itself is not bad/good, as neither is long or short hair. It all depends on how you wear the hair


I like my cute rock star hair :( I realize no one gives a shit but me but that doesn’t make it easier. I haven’t started balding and hopefully i don’t.

iirc balding only happens to half of males and it’s genetic so there’s a good chance you never will :)

Thanks for giving me hope. :)






Devin Townsend before and after


Did that first guy shave his glasses off?


Hello, yes. I am still mad. I would like to request another free meme or I will fart.


One puuuuunch


That sub is heavily biased, some of the guys look fine with hair, like they just turned from full line into widows peak and it still looks good on them. But then they post a bald pic of themselves and the sub goes crazy.

Not to mention the clear survivorship bias. You’ll only see the ones that look better, as the ones than don’t won’t post, or won’t get upvoted.



I’m glad guys have found a way to deal with this, but if I lose my lustrous mane I will kill myself.


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