magic johnson

Magic Johnson Rejoins The Lakers

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Last week, basketball legend Magic Johnson rejoined the Los Angeles Lakers, four years after learning he was HIV-positive. NBA doctors have assured the league's players that they have absolutely nothing to worry about. As long as when they are guarding Magic, they remember not to have sex with him.
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Magic Johnson Suspended

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In basketball news, Magic Johnson was suspended for three games and fined ten thousand dollars for bumping official Scott Foster. Said a distraught Johnson after the game, "This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
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Magic Johnson's New Book

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In publishing news, Magic Johnson has received a five million dollar advance from Random House for his new book, entitled "What You Can Do to Avoid AIDS." Chapter one? "Don't have sex with me."
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Magic Johnson Suspended

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In basketball news, Magic Johnson was suspended for three games and fined ten thousand dollars for bumping official Scott Foster. Said a distraught Johnson after the game, "This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me."
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