My cards against humanity for this year of our lord, 2026. Most are political

Text Version:

WHITE CARDS

Profiting off of your husband’s death

Fascism

Anchor baby

Creating Mexican joker

Mar-a-lago face

Epstein files

Redacted

Wearing a red hat

Bankrupting casinos

Makeup room at the Pentagon

Starving kids

Harassing trans people in the bathroom

Nazi salute

Investing in cryptocurrency

Ballroom

Gold leaf on everything

Social media

AI slop

Data centers

Ancestry genetic testing

Gooners

Fucking a couch

Student loan debt

Passport bros

Brain worms

Fake crying

Molotov cocktails

Lying, just constantly lying

Being Jesus

A little treat

Growing your own weed

Lego videos from Iran

Zorro Ranch

Being bug-eyed

The antichrist

Doing a Luigi

Mass surveillance

Illiterate kids

Flesh eating bugs

Drunk texting military plans to journalist

Healthcare

Ketamine

Miss teen USA

Cage fighting

Drinking bleach

Poor people

Parasite class

Guillotines

Algae

Military industrial complex

“Legal” Tax evasion

Giving yourself money

Being above the law

Burning Teslas

White South Afrikaners

BLACK CARDS

The next big event at the White House will be showcasing _ followed by _.

Techbros have decided that their next big investment is going to be all in for _.

I went to a local university campus to legitimize my new grift of _.

I made billions selling _ to the U.S military.

I made millions selling _ to the MAGAs.

How I owned the libs:

How I got on Trump’s cabinet:

It’s not the American way unless it finishes with .

A great way to make money in this economy:

You can always get away with as long as you blame it on .

(alternative: You can always get away with _ as long as you blame it on immigrants.)

I had to move to Argentina and change my name because _ found out about _.

RFK keeps telling me that _ will fix my measles rash, but it’s not working.

The way I would make America great again is by first causing _ and then offering a solution of _.