Analysis and Qualitative Effects of Large Breasts on Aerodynamic Performance and Wake of a “Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid” Character

The abstract, in case anyone else also thought this was a joke:

A computational fluid dynamics methodology is used to study the salient flow features around the breasts of a human figure and to describe the aerodynamic differences imparted by their geometric presence. Two models are proposed for examination: a 3-dimensional reference based on a character design with a significantly buxom figure and a modification of this design where the breast size is reduced significantly. The two models are tested at speeds ranging from 1 to 30m⋅s^-1 using Reynolds-averaged Navier Stokes (RANS). Drag, lift, and skin friction forces, along with turbulence kinetic energy (TKE), are investigated and compared between the different models. The present results are expected to provide useful information on the validity of the statement, “Flat is Justice” in terms of an aerodynamic standpoint. In addition to this, the results can offer worthwhile data investigating the anthropometrical presence of large breasts on sport aerodynamics.

The file name is funny

The most important sentence:

From what has been presented in this preliminary work, it is safe to conclude that the phrase “Flat is Justice” is deficient aerodynamically.

Definitely an Ignobel Prize contender.